The yellow umbrella theory

I’m a big fan of how i met your mother and the fact that season 9 has begun has really got me excited. Really really excited.
I know i haven been writing awhile and part of the reason is that i’ve been busy but also i never felt that what i wrote was complete, nor did it have that flare in it…
I didn’t felt the writing come to life, so there, 20 drafts , 20 potential entries in  suspended animation because i cant bring back Frankenstein. Maybe ill bring them to life someday, maybe ill just bury them. I don’t know?
Having said that, i did have a sudden urge to write about himym, and i haven done a theory in a while… So to all the fellow fans out there, here’s the yellow umbrella theory.

The idea is pretty simple. Its comes off based on what Ted said.

“Kids, there’s more than one story of how I met your mother. You know the short version, the thing with your mom’s yellow umbrella, but there’s a bigger story…”

Everything that ever happens in our lives is part of a story that leads to the one that really matters.

In the 10 years of himym, Ted dated a dozen girls. He met the dream girl who became his best friend and then later married his other best friend. He met the girl in pefect night, didnt get her number but yet somehow manage to find her back. He made 10mins the most memorable date for a mother who doesnt have time for herself. He fell in love with the girl who opposed everything he believed in. He dated/banged his bestfriend’s sister…

But after 9 seasons, a thousand girls later , Ted still haven found the mother.

And at this point in time it seems pretty hopeless.

You see…Shit happens
The girl of his dreams is gonna marry his bestfriend, he finds it hard to not admit that actually he still feels something for her.
He got left at the altar.
He found the girl who got away, stole her from her wedding and get her back only to lose her again .
He had his heart broken and torn, ripped out and stepped on.
He grilled meat in the room of his dream girl out of loneliness.

He did a lot of crazy things.

I mean… we all did.
But you know its okay because at the end of the day, he is sitting on a sofa telling that wonderful story that so many people now know by heart.

Here’s my theory.
At the end of it all, we are just looking for that one huge crazy story that we can sit down and tell our kids about. That out of the 7billion people in the world, after finding time and time again for that one, the perfect girl is now in the kitchen making a salami sandwhich. (I hope she remembers the mayo.)
At the end of it all, what we really want is to sit by the bed side of our 4 year old hyperactive son and 2 year old precious daughter and ask as we tuck them into bed , “Hey kids, have i ever told you about how i met your mother?”

At the end of it all, all these moments of fear ,frustration and disappointment are just memories and events to lead to the real story. The really big one, the one that will take us 8 years to tell? That’s the rest of it, how we came to be who we are, how each episode made us a little wiser and braver to love. How it made us the person your mother fell in love with.

Dear friend , the other Ted, you know who you are.

This one is for you.
You might think its kinda crazy to try and fall over and over again, so desperately trying to find that one person who not just tolerate our flaws and quirks, but actually kinda likes them.

Love shouldn’t be about tolerating someone for the rest of your life, you didn’t get married just so you can spend eternity hating each other.

Maybe you forget that you believe in love and fate and all that chessy stuff, maybe you given up hope. But i promise you, hold on, keep waiting, she’s coming for you.

Also, don’t ever miss out on the crazy moments with your friends. Just because you don’t know how its gonna end doesn’t mean you can enjoy the ride.
And if she really doesn’t turn up, you got nothing to worry about.

Cause no matter what, you’ve got me. (:
Promise.
Just wait for it .. Its gonna be legen….
Well, you know the rest. 😉

To those who haven seen himym, i strongly recommend it.
Its a little long, its been around for awhile but you got time to catch up.

The last season just started.

Join the club guys, we’ve got jackets.

Cheers
Z

Rest. Why sometimes we just need to be alone

 

Yesterday I took a day of from writing.
Instead I took the day off deciding on what I want to do with my life.
I thought about what are the things I screwed up recently.
I thought about my dreams and my goals.
And at the end of the day, I have this come to this conclusion.

I have no freaking idea what to do.

Sounds pretty pathetic but really, sometimes in life we just have no idea where we are going, so we take a rest.

In music , there is a sign which tells us to pause or to stop playing. Ask any musician and they will tell you the rest note is just as important as every other note in the score sheet.

Ask the DJ and he’d tell you that pause before dropping the bass is what makes the crowd go wild .

Ask the dude playing the triangle in an ensemble and he’d tell you that’s the only thing he sees, besides the occasionally one to two ‘ tings’. Poor guy.

Point is.. sometimes in life we need to just stop playing every single note we can. Taken , yes , we need chords, harmonies and melodies to make our lives meaningful, we need them to create the emotions in our lives, to make us sway with the symphony of life, but really, sometimes what we really need is a simple rest. That one second of silence brings back all the emotions to this one point of reflection and acceptance of the song. And then the song keeps going.

Just because you took a break from life doesn’t mean your quitting, in fact your coming back better and stronger than ever.

And sometimes that rest just means you need to be alone for a moment.

So the harmony will keep playing, or the bass becomes the melody and the music shifts it focus from you to something else and you know what?

That’s okay,  you need this silence.

Guess what, I’d never have known all these if I hadn’t pissed of somebody important to me by not leaving her alone, ( among some other stupid stuff that I did which I am not proud of and shall not reveal to the internet. )

And then because of that, it kinda just forced me to take a moment to dwell in the silence, and in that silence I found a clearer view of who I really am. I realized what is it I really need.

Some time to be alone.

So for those’s who’s melodies are getting too messed up for you, who feels that you can longer play the music any more.

Take a rest.

Sit back, relax and just enjoy the silence.

It’ll be alright, everything will turn out just fine, I promise.

Keep going all, TGIF (:

Cheers

Z

You Should Fall For Someone Who Doesn’t Love You

(: awesome

Thought Catalog

It occurred to me the other day that there might be people in this world who have never known unrequited love, have never fallen for someone who didn’t fall too.

I know it’s rarer than a solar eclipse, but it seems likely that some have managed it; people who married their high school sweetheart, who got it right on the first try, who were seemingly born with enough innate confidence to walk right up to the object of their affection and say, “I think you’re great, would you like to go on a date sometime” and whose confidence was rewarded with a resolute, “Absolutely, I’d love to” and a Happily Ever After. The rest of us would be inclined to murder a couple like this if we ever came across them, but I maintain that they are the ones who are missing out. Everyone should fall for someone who doesn’t…

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We think too much and feel too little

We think too much and feel too little

We think too much and feel too little

We have developed speed, but we have shut ourselves in. Machinery that gives abundance has left us in want. Our knowledge has made us cynical; our cleverness, hard and unkind. We think too much and feel too little. More than machinery, we need humanity. More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness. Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost.

The Great Dictator.

One of the greatest, if not the greatest speech ever made.

Some classics never fail to inspire, no matter how many decades has passed. While others hard manage to leave an impression.

To be honest, I hate most modern sci-fi. ( Not all)

It’s tasteless, full of clichés and over used ideas, hot girls and big guns. Simply just to attract the mainstream audience.

Bullshit

Sci-fi is so much more. It is supposed to make you look forward and yet at the same time fear the future.

It is supposed to challenge our ethical standings on our moral code, open our eyes to the black, white and grey of science.

It is supposed to make us think about life, about our humanity and about our mortality.

It mocks our hubris as humans to think that we are gods, to think that because we understand science, we control the universe and that we are in control of our lives.

When the reality is quite the opposite, because most of the time we have absolutely no control over our lives, much less the universe.

That even after attaining the power to create artificial intelligence, poverty will never cease to exist if we are unable to create people who care about others, people with compassion.

That even after achieving time travel; we will never progress or reach the peak of our capacity if we never learn from our past mistakes.

That even after achieving telepathy technology, we will never be able to connect with another human’s soul unless we learn to show our own, to learn to empathize and trust and to understand.

That even if we create the perfect human beings, we will never be near perfect unless we learn to accept each other for our own imperfections and to accept ourselves for our weaknesses.

That even if we can increase the intellectual capacity, our minds will be no more wiser, no more smarter,  no less duller unless we learn to keep it open and accept the perspectives of others and put aside that pride of ours.

That in the future, it is not the technology that would change our lives but the people who use them.

That in this future, it is not the engineers who determine how it would be but the innovators, the dreamers and the artists to carve the inspirations of the future on pages and in the minds of people, to inspire them to turn fiction into reality.

So please, stop ruining sci fi for nerds like me. I’m getting cancer just by watching it.

If not, I’m sending my Xenomorphs to hunt you down where ever you are.

To everyone else,

Cheers

Z

Need and Want theory

The Need and Want theory.

She’s ranting about that guy again. The things he did that swayed her, the thoughtfulness he showed, this one is different she said. Yet somehow they never seem to be more than friends.

That’s how it usually goes, a nice cup of coffee, sweet music and the ranting of his best friend.

The perfect afternoon.

He said nothing, he just smiled to himself.
” What?”
” Nothing… I just thought it’s funny that you are in love again.”

“Well,one of us to be. You never seem to be in love. I don’t even know the kind of girl you like.”

He tried to think of how to describe it. There was a brief silence as she watched him struggle.

“i’m looking for some one who fufiles my wants and my needs.” He said, sipping his coffee.

“Is this something to do with that uniform fetish of yours?”

He let out a laugh involuntarily , almost choking on the beverage.

” Its not! ”  He tried to put in to words what he meant, what has been on his mind all these while.

“I have a theory… its call the need and want theory….

Every relationship in our lives is built around two factors, want and need.

Want would refer to how much we desire another person, the kind of attraction that we have towards them.

Need would refer to how dependent are we on another person.

In a nut shell, the need and want theory helps us to understand the importance of people in our lives and the position that they have in it.”

He paused to let the thought sink in. As he did he studied her face, the way her body language, how her head was tilted backwards as she tries to understand. He knew her expressions all too well… he seen all of it, he been there for her every emotions, happiness, grief, regret…

To know whether she was confused or not seemed almost trivial.

” Let me explain…”

He took out a pen and drew on a napkin

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“For instance , if we need someone more than we want them, we often find ourselves depending our way of life on theirs .

The people we need in our lives can have many different functions that keep us going. Some play the role of the comforter , the shoulder to cry on, the friend. ”

He paused . This time to see if she will get his hint. He smiled at her, she did not notice. She never does, he thought…

Yes, the friend. When a girl needs you more than she wants you, this is where you find yourself stuck in.
” I believe that guys and girls can be just friends, after all if the relationship is based on need, like the need for emotional support, the need for like minds, the need for a female perspective , its not going anywhere other . ”
Just like you my friend. You are stuck in the friend zone. He said to himself.

” So if you are wondering why a guy whom you like turns you down, friend zones you, leaves you hanging. Chances are he needs you, but he doesn’t want you. Don’t blame him, its not an easy decision to make either and I promise you, friendship last longer than most relationships. I’ll explain why later . ”

” Looking at the other end of the graph, what if you want someone but don’t need them?
As crudely put as possible, its just a crush.
Yes you can say you fallen head over heels for her, fallen so deep that you can’t get out , quote me the top ten cheesiest quotes from Nicholas sparks book , sing me a JB song ( I swear I will punch you for that) , cry me a river, but really, if your relationship is based on how much you want him, its nothing more than a crush.

If I isolate you from him, you’ll survive although some might be a little whinny and annoying.

Nothing duct tape can’t fix. ”

She laughed, thought for a while and nodded.
” So what your saying is that I want him, but I don’t need him?”
” I think that’s for you to decide.”
“How do you decide if someone is a need or want?”

” Well, want is a result of our desires, whether it is the physically attraction, or the fact that he fits a certain profile that you desire or admire, .  Sometimes we like someone simply because we want to be wanted, and that they satisfy that condition, some guys are very good at making a girl feel wanted, but that’s just for the period that they like the girl. Want, like all other kinds of desire will fade from one time or another. You cannot sustain a relationship based on want. ”

” So you are saying that if this is a crush, it will fade over time?”

” Yes, but only if you stop keeping in touch with him. Once he stops making you feel wanted, do you still think you will love him? Or do you just love the feeling that he gives you, making you feel like a princess?”

She smiled but said nothing, she didn’t had to. He knew what she was thinking.

” What about need?”

“Need is different. Our needs are based on our dependency towards people, be it how much we trust someone, get emotional support from them, sometimes we need them because they need us.”

“Need can withstand time, we won’t lose them unless they have been replaced from our lives. But honestly, things like trust and understanding is hard to replace. Hence a ‘need’ based relationship  last longer.”

“What about when you need someone as much as you want them?”

“Well,this is just my opinion, but I feel that when that happens… That’s my condition to fall in love. If she can make me want her as much as I need her, I swear I will never let her go.”

“Sounds like an overly attached boyfriend in the making.”

They laughed, finished their coffee. It was getting dark and it was time to call it a day.

“You know, you never told me whether I was a want or a need to you.” she said

” I thought you would know? You’re my best friend, of course I need you.”

He thought for a moment, he knew that that was  right answer, that she can only just be a need to him. You do not want your best friend. He told himself. Yet that was only half true.

They left the cafe, he let his final thought about her question linger like the aroma of coffee.

“I want you to need me more than I need you to want me.”

The End

Writer’s note: I gotten quite a few feedback from people before I decided to post this up, many thanks to all of you. (:

Also, I know that not everyone will agree with the theories, whether its this one or any others that I wrote, but I hope to hear what you think.

Have a great weekend ahead. Hope to hear from you guys soon.

Cheers

Z

The Disney Theory

We all know the story. Or at least you think you do.

 

Its cliché, overused and unrealistic.

 

Yet we still love it anyway.

 

I mean… Disney paints such beautiful pictures of love.

Fall in love with that girl.

Love in first sight.

 

Steal her from her evil boyfriend cause you know her better, and only you can give her the happiness she deserves.

 

Live happily ever after

 

 

Save her from the wicked witch, a tower, a dragon. Be her prince charming, ride a white horse a magic carpet or heck, and ride a donkey for all I care…

 

Live happily ever after.

 

Happily ever after… really?

 

Every girl wants to be a Disney princess. Wear a gown, crystal shoes, suffer the wrath of a wicked witch, and chew a poison apple… Anything to be the damsel in distress. Waiting for the prince charming to come by. Every guy wants to make the girl his princess. Or queen.

I’ve heard some differing point of views.

 

And at the end of the day, what sums all of it up?

 

A happy ending.

 

Yet our notions of love fall flat in the face of reality. Love very often isn’t as Disney as we expect it to be. Here’s how the story really goes, if it even does. You fall for the girl of your dreams, your best friend, the one who understands you like no other.

 

You chase her, make her feel like a princess, and in turn she falls in love with you. The start is great, the real love story follows. Conflicts arrives, she’s not the princess you thought she is. She gets jealous easily, her temper is horrible, you live under her wrath, she never understands you, and you? How could you possibly understand someone so unreasonable?

 

Where was the girl you once loved? Gone.

 

The after story begins. The best friend becomes the princess; the princess becomes the witch, the ice queen, the dragon.

 

Call it what you want, you know its falling apart.

 

And the prince? He finds another girl, someone who understands him better another best friend…Or he shouts his grieves online as the word sighs for his sorry plight.

But in reality, he’s no better. Who broke the magic? Was it when he started looking at other options, poisoning the princess with jealousy? Or when the feelings faded, hence the magic ends? Or when the man turns into the monster, in anger, in rage, in jealousy.

 

The prince becomes the hypocrite, the victim of love, the beast.

Suddenly it isn’t love that broke the spell. Love is the spell. And it broke with the simplest trick of the book. Time.

Suddenly our love stories become tragedies. We wonder why it always happens to us. Why people always change. We weep in our beds, cursing and swearing.

 

(Now I know I sound like a sour old man, some loser who got his heart broken and now has completely and utterly lost faith in love.  Bear with me, I can promise you I’m still very much the same me.)

 

So that’s how Disney movies go isn’t it?

Or is it…

 

I beg to differ. For me, I like to watch my Disney movies in a different light.

You see… To get the princess, yes we must climb the tower, fight the dragons and slay the witches.

 

But these things aren’t on the outside.

 

They represent the darker side of us. And the ones we love…They are our inner demons, our anger and rage and wrath…We trap ourselves in towers, build walls that hide and protect ourselves from the world, from how others might think of us.. Secretly hoping for someone to tear them down. Someone to embrace the ugly side of us, the beauty in the beast, the frog prince…

 

Love is about these battles, the battles inside. And us? We play every role, the good, the bad and the ugly. Love is about finding that one person that brings out the best in you, the one who can accept the worse in you and the one who understands you like nobody else.

 

The Disney stories were made easy for kids to understand.

 

You don’t find it at the credits; it’s something that you fight for even if it means fighting for the rest of your life.

It is like every other life lesson, something you learn through life…

 

 

And the cost of true love? The price of happily ever after?

 

Never looking back, not regretting a single moment or a choice.

 

Even if that choice is letting.

 

Even if in the end…  The person she ends up with isn’t you.

 

Because you see… It doesn’t matter if she has her happily ever after with you.

 

She just needs to be happy.

 

 

 

To all, happily ever after.

 

Z

 

The Color theory

This one is for all the creative minds (: Kinda long, sorry if it bores ya.

In art, color theory is basically understanding and making sense of the colors around us. Colors are basically a result of light bouncing of a surface and being reflected into our eyes. In life, the color theory of people isn’t that different to. The kind of personality that we see in every individual is a result of looking at them at different lights. And in those lights we shape our perception  of the people around us.

We look at colors in 3 main aspects, the hue the lightness and the saturation.Hue refers to the kind of color it contains. Lightness refers to how dark or light .Saturation is well… how saturated.I guess the same could be said about people.

Our hue is what we call our individual characteristics, whether we are patient, dominant, passive, aggressive…Our lightness refers to the contrast in our personality, whether is it a mild mixture , or a striking contrast of different characteristics .Our saturation would referring to which traits are more dominant, a more saturated hue will give the painting an overall feel and tone. Our dominant personalities will make up the impression.

There are no limits to how colors can be matched, similarly its impossible to classify humans by their personality. You can try but you will end up generalizing, missing the details, overlooking what makes them unique. Each individual has their own painting, creating a distinct impression upon one another … Believe me when I say there’s no one like you. Each one of us is special.Having said that I would like to share my three favorite color themes .

The first is grey scale. Or just simply referred to as black and white. n. No colors. Such paintings I find incredibly honest, simple and yet striking. People who’s personality is in greyscale are rather amazing too. To some they maybe boring or unattractive, yet by simple contrasts of grey  , they develop their own personality. They lead very morally defined lives, using the contrast of black and white, right and wrong to define who they are. They follow principles that are clear and concise, they are like bedrocks, steady, unmoveable , firm.. yet some of us are unable to see such lines so clearly.

Another kind of color scheme is known as Analogous Relationship , where the colors are located adjacent to each other, people like that generally give a clear idea of their personality. For instance a person could be warm, like red orange and yellow, or cool like blue, violet and purple. Their colors make up their core personality, their colors create  a homogeneous impression, rarely doing things that conflicts with their personality. Such people are easy to understand and hence making them more approachable.

The last kind i want to talk about is complementary colors.

This I would say make up the bulk of the most beautiful people I know. And is also one of the color schemes that creates the most beautiful pictures, as well as people. As simple as it is, complementary colors are colors across the color wheel.

When talking in terms of people, it means people who show contrasting personalities.

Like when someone who is usually timid finding strength to speak up for what they believe in.

Or Someone who is usually withdrawn to share their insecurities.

Even someone who is usually strong to show pain.

These are people who step out of their comfort zone to confront with their inner turmoils, these are people who dare to mix the palette forming newer and more mind blowing   combinations, creating contrasts and confusions, creativity and chaos.

We all have a personal preference to the colors we love, be it the impressions they leave us or the emotions they evoke.

It takes time to understand how is it possible that such play of light can lead to such amazing connections.

And i find it even more amazing that we too look at people in different lights to see the colors that make up their life….

To see what truly makes them beautiful.

Cheers

Z